Don't die so far from the sea
by BlueOdesta
Summary: Finnick Odair, the victor from District 4, died during war. This is how three of his most beloved friends and himself lived the experience. Nightlock, nightlock, nightlock.


_A little piece of advice: I totally disliked Finnick's death, as it was poorly narrated. He was one of the main characters, and they only gave him half a paragraph. So, here are the thoughts of three of his most beloved people._

_PS: I'm sorry if this one is a little chaotic, but I wanted to keep Annie's spirit and so, and we all know that she is a bit chaotic herself._

_I hope you enjoy._

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**1.- Do you remember?**

_(Annie's pov)_

Do you remember the first time we saw each other? I had already seen you, of course. You were Finnick Odair, our victor, the boy who looked like he had been born with a trident in his hand. I had seen you in your reaping, when you were about to volunteer, we all knew you were going to, and the picked your name. I saw you in your Games. I saw you taking the blade in the Cornucopia, killing that girl from the six. I saw you knotting a net, getting your trident. I saw you killing your last ally, that boy from district one –Marcus, was he? I can't recall his name. I saw you in your victory tour.

I mean that time we saw each other, that time you saw me. That time I volunteered, and you became my mentor. Do you remember, Finn? Do you remember my Games? You surely remember them. When they killed Dan. When I killed her. When I hid and ate nothing for five days. When the Arena flooded. When I outswam the others. When I won.

Do you remember the cherries? I still don't know how my father managed to get them. I think he asked them to the Capitol. I remember how we ate them all, alone at the beach. It was the first day I came near the sea after my Games. I was so afraid of the water… even if it saved me.

They haven't told me, but I know it. I know that you are gone. Gone forever. And now I am at loss without my anchor. Without you, I am not me. I have no place to call home.

And I know, I know that the time will come when our son will grow up in a world without danger. Without Games. I know it, because you are Finnick Odair, and you died for that future. You left me because of that. And I will never forgive you if you fail.

I don't know where I'm going to be in ten, five, one year without you. I don't know where I'm going to be tomorrow. I don't know where I am going to be within an hour.

I can't hear the waves crashing, no without you.

Do you remember that time when you first loved me? Do you remember the last time you loved me? Do you remember my panic, my fear, when I told you we were going to have a baby? Because I do remember your calm, your hands, your mouth, your eyes, telling me that there was nothing to worry about. That our child would not live in a world with Games. That we never have to witness him die. Not in a pantomime.

Please, Finn, please, come back. I beg you. Come back to me. I don't wanna live without you. I don't have anything to give, no if you are not with me.

I'm just alone.

Do you remember Thomas, Finn? Do you remember his beautiful, large, blue eyes? Do you remember him, running in the shore, trying to catch you? I will never forgive them, Finn, I will never forget it. How could I? How, when they killed him? How, when they killed my little brother? People said it was an accident. But we both know that accidents just don't happen… not to us, victors. And, of course, not to me, the broken one. They wanted to punish me, Mags said. They wanted to punish me for winning the Games.

Because I won. I was, I am, a victor. But I did it thanks to you. You were there, the only person that could help me. Do you remember what happened after I killed Arianne? I will never forget her name. But I don't, I don't remember what happened after that. All I can recall is her blood in my hands, the knife buried in her neck, Dan's blood shining in her sword. And then, I remember the water. I remember the ocean coming to save me, erasing the other tributes, embracing me. It was you, Finn, as you are my ocean, my home, my savior, my life.

There were times, you remember them? There were times when the whole world was looking at you. When you won. When I won. When they saw us together. When we got married, dressed in white and green, the colors of the sea. You will be with me until the end of time.

Do you remember those times you had to go to the Capitol? When you had to meet those people? When you had to convince them to pay to save the lives of those little kids that, like us, were forced to kill each other? Thank you, Finn, for never telling me what you did in there. I could not have borne another Games. My Games were the last one, until you had to go back to the Arena. I never saw any Games after I became a victor, until yours.

I saw you in the jungle. Fighting the jabberjays. Fighting my screams. I was ok, Finn. They never touched me. I saw you swimming, Finn. I saw you salving Peeta's live. I like Peeta. He's kind, he's generous. He's what a victor should be, a caring person, not a killer. Because we can only fight the Capitol's wrath if we help and love each other. And he does, Finn, he loves people. He's not like the rest of us. We are selfish. We are killers. I saw you fishing. I saw you green. I saw you swimming. I saw you hugging Johanna. I saw you saving the boy, again, and again.

I saw Mags' death. I saw the tears falling down from your eyes.

But you lived. You left the Arena. You made it. I knew it, I knew you would. I believed in you.

Do you remember what happened afterwards? They took me, Finn. But it didn't matter, as you were alive. You were with me. In another place, in a dead district. But you were with me. Now you are not, and the dead one is you.

Do you remember the dog from the beach? That one that looked just like a sheep? Do you remember it swimming? Do you remember how it ate all of our food while we were swimming? Swimming at midnight… It is one of the reasons I'm glad I was a victor, being able of swimming in the night. The other reason is you. I met you thanks to the Games. I met my whole me, thanks to the Games.

Do you remember the rope around my neck, the fear in your eyes, my mouth over yours? I couldn't handle it anymore, living without Thomas, knowing it was my entire fault. If I had died in the Games, he could have lived. But I didn't. I stole life from him. I had no reason to live at all. Until I saw you, and you kissed me, you kissed me for the very first time. Do you remember the salty flavor? Salt from your swimmer lips. Salt from my guilty tears. Salt from home.

You gave me a life. You gave me my life. And now you are giving your own life. You are giving it for our baby.

You are doing this for our Tommy.


End file.
